Cole is TEARING up the local wildlife. Someone fucking JOLTS up to Cole. "HEY, DIPSHIT!"
Cole's bone claws are fully extended while tearing into a deer as he snaps to staring at them his voice is slightly gravely and deeper then normal, "What the fuck could you possibly want??" The skull's jaw moves as he speaks.
"THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?! YOU CAN'T JUST FUCKING RUN AROUND AND DESTROY THE FUCKING WILDLIFE YOU WHORE!" She's furious and seemingly defenseless.
"I THINK I CAN WHEN I HAVE A THIRST FOR" Cole's voice deepens "BLOOD"
"God fucking-" She sighs before going through her backpack and grabbing something. She throws a vial of... something? to Cole. "Here. Free enhanced enaturalist blood. Shit can fuel you for like, a week."
Cole catches it and stares at it, "Is it fresh?"
"Somewhat. We got it a while ago and kept it frozen. I was walking around with it cuz I keep it as a sample." She chuckles. "Shit is STRONG! Can give an addict a great trip. Also, uhh..." She looks up and down at Cole. "We never tried it on a demon before. I mean, we have, but mostly just like, lust demons and shit. We sell to them often."
"....what does that mean, what does it do?" Cole stands up, he's slightly taller. 6'3 or 6'4, hard to tell.
Sigh. "It's slightly altered to be able to give someone a nice high and to quell bloodlust. Killing two birds with one stone, y'know? It's a special mix. I take it at least twice a month."
"Hmm" Cole's bone armor retracts as the wounds heals "Cool, cool" Cole shrinks back down to 6'1 "You're not trying to kill me right?"
"Want me to take a shot?" She smirks.
"....sure, fuck it why not"
"Hand it over." She holds out her hand and Cole hands them the vial. She opens it and drinks around half of it. "Ughh... great shit. I have another one if you want a full one, and if you ever want like, a gallon of the stuff you can just hit the enaturalist hotline up."
"I'm not a pussy give me the full shot"
She goes through her backpack and hands him a full vial. "Enjoy the buzz, man. Reminder, the enaturalist hotline! 107.1 FM, radio or walkie-talkie only." She waves. "May Gaia bless your next quarter-moon."
Cole blinks, "Alright? I'll keep that in mind," Cole takes the shot from the vial. Everything seems fine. Cole feels a bit hot, but it's fine. "...man this blood ain't shit." Cole sighs and pulls at his collar, "Why am I getting warmer though?" The more he speaks, the more his voice sounds... feminine? "What is happening to my voice? What the fuck did this bitch give me?" Cole looks confused. He starts to get a bit shorter. "Why the fuck am I getting SHORTER WHY" Cole's shirt was not designed to hold tiddies so there's a lot cleavage, Cole's pants stretch slightly as her thighs get slightly fatter as their hair grows down to her shoulders; her eyes are red whore eyes their eyelashes become more pronounced as they pulls at the collar of their shirt.
If I had to see it, you had to read it. It sounds like there's some giggling coming from a bush, but that could just be, well, the high. It's enaturalist enhanced blood.
Cole snaps to staring at the bush, "Who, who is in this bush," Cole walks over to the bush and stares at it.
"Heheheheheh- ENJOY THE TRIP, BOZO!"
"YOU BITCH"
She gets up and RUNS
"I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU" Cole huffs and storms back to the house.
---
Orpheus walks through the front door, now wearing a black tanktop and some grey sweatpants. "Did I miss anything."
"Cole ran off for who knows what reason, I cant find him," Isaac says.
"Have you tried using your cole watch."
"My what now"
Cole struts into the living room and looks around. Isaac glances up.
Orpheus stares at the woman. "What the fuck."
"...I can explain"
KADE ENTERS. Isaac's face contorts as tears run down his face and he sprints to the hall. Luna walks in. "What the fuck."
"WHAT THE FUCK." Orpheus grabs Genesone and SHAKES her. Kade stares. He is struggling to keep it together. ORPHEUS IS CACKLING LOUDLY. HE'S LOSING HIS SHIT.
"...you got bigger booba than I do." Luna is flat asf.
"It's not that funny guys"
"COLE WHAT RHE FUCK HAPPENED."
"It is extremely funny. You're also hot." Luna hates herself for saying that.
"I GOT DRUGGED IN THE FOREST"
KADE STARTS FUCKING CACKLING HANDS ARE ON HIS FUCKING KNEES. Oleander walks in and looks at Cole. "Oh cool, are you transgender too?"
"What" Cole looks over at Oleander as Otto walks in from the hall.
"Yo, sorry for breaking in again, I just-" Otto looks at Cole. Ka d e w h e e z e s. "...god fucking damn it Sarah-"
"And who the hell is this?" Luna asks, directed at Otto.
"YOU GOT FUCKING ESTROGENED IN THE WOODS????" Orpheus laughs.
"Cole..." Sparrow stares
Oleander looks confused. "Didnt you just go get top surgery?"
"YEAH I FUCKING DID SOME BITCH GAVE ME SOME BLOOD AND EXTROGENED ME"
"THE GENESONE GOT FUCKING ESTROGENED." Kade wheezes.
Otto looks at Luna. "Otto Karpf, enaturalist. Broke in cuz my boss told me to do it."
"You." Cole stares at Otto "YOU"
Otto looks back at Cole. "Huh?"
"WHO IS YOUR BOSS"
"Sarah Rothenberg."
Oleander looks really confused.
"Oh. Nice to meet you Otto? Wait Karp? Like fish?" Luna shows him the poster that had been dropped off a few days ago. "There was this thing left on the front porch with a dead fish. Was this you?"
"I didnt know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Sparrow sounds happy.
"WHAT THE FUCK. WHERE WAS THAT KINDA DRUG WHEN I NEEDED IT LIKE 10 YEARS AGO." Orpheus lets Cole go. He's struggling to keep it together.
Otto looks at Luna again. God this is sensory overloading- "Yeah, I left another one like, yesterday."
"Sparrow, Sparrow this wasn't my choice I got drugged in the woods and now I'm a fucking woman," Cole sobs
Otto looks at Cole. "Okay dude, chill, I can, uh..."
Oleandee blinks. "So youre... not trans?"
"Oh....good for you though!" Sparrow still sounds happy
"...wait, you said you drank blood?" Otto asks.
Luna turns to Orpheus, "I fucking feel ya dude. I would've LOVED magical estrogen before. Spent a decade+ trying to transition. And I'm still--" She trails off.
Orpheus walks over to Oleander and HUGS him. He's CRYING from LAUGHTER. "I'm happy for you, Pal." Otto's kinda having a full on breakdown.
Oleander is hugged and pats Orpheus back, confused as shit "Happy for me?"
"I'm entering cardiac arre s t." Kade's struggling to stand up.
"SHUSH" Cole tries to kick Kade in the BALLS
Kade catches HER leg with HIS leg and then pins her against a WALL. "Wanna try that again, hotcakes?"
Orpheus unhugs Oleander and STARES AT KADE. "HOTCAKES??? WHAT. HAHAHHAA"
Cole blinks and just says nothing. Kade grins then backs off, "I HAVEN'T FLIRTED WITH ANYONE IN A WHILE, GIVE ME A BREAK."
"YOU'RE AWFUL AT IT"
"You said you drank blood, right?" Otto asks.
Cole chuckles and turns to Otto, "Yeah it was blood, why?" Cole's head tilts slightly.
"She... probably laced it with, uh... something else-"
"What did she lace it with." Cole Stares at Otto.
"We tend to, uh, sell blood to demons a lot, mainly lust demons, and uhh... sometimes they want like... a little extra besides just THC...?" He stutters before talking again. "What I'm saying is that it probably had an aphrodisiac."
"....." Cole stares at Otto, "I pray for the men in this house"
"I'll be fine." Kade says.
"We need to paint your nails" Sparrow smiles.
"L-Listen, you'll be fine! It'll only last... uhh... rough estimate since you're a... wraaath demon? Blind guess; uh, it should last about a week or so." Otto mumbles.
"A WEEK????"
"...." Cole smiles
"A WEEK??????????"
"The, well, femininity, the aphrodisiac is probably gonna run out a bit earlier-" Otto sighs.
"So uhhhh should we call you something different Cole? Would you want to be called Colleen or like Diamond?" Luna says.
"Imagine having a name close to Collard Greens," Kade chuckles
"Why the hell would I wanna be called dia-" It hits Cole like a truck "I fucking hate you people"
"What about Megan?" Sparrow suggests.
"MEGAN"
"MEGAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA"
"YES. PERFECT."
Luna cackles!
"Megan from Drake and Josh." Otto says.
"MEGAN????"
"MEGAN."
"DO NOT CALL ME MEGAN"
"Okay Megan."
"Megan it is"
"We're running with Megan, thank you."
"MEGAN GENEDAUGHTER."
"Okay Megan."
"HOLY FUCKING SHIT."
Cole draws his revolver and shoots into the ceiling, "SHUT UP"
"Whoa whoa whoa, sorry Meg."
Reembabroombalo has been shot.